Simple Man

Too often, society tries to dictate what it means to be a “real man.” They tell you what kind of job is manly, what kind of hobbies, who to love, etc. Those who do not fit their mold get outcast. They are scoffed at; called names. They are called sissy, fag and such. If you don’t fit in their mold, they dont know how to handle it. To them, different equates to bad.

Before us is a shameful epidemic as a result of bullying… Suicide. Young men and boys taking their own lives because someone else viewed them as different and made them pay for being who they are. Now, a mother is without that child because some ignorant fool did not know to accept someone’s individuality.

These external pressures play a role in one’s psyche. There are many and great internal struggles men face with regards to how they “fit” in society, ESP if it’s not the “norm.” What these individuals fail to realize and are blinded of because of stereotypes is just how beautiful they are. It’s their individuality that makes them special; makes them unique – makes them, THEM! Brave is he who stands in the face of intolerance and says, I’m me. I’m amazing. I love me and I’m not changing just because you think I should.

Sadly, not enough of these beautiful spirits feel good enough about themselves to realize it. Often, they feel like a burden or feel so helpless, without a voice or anywhere to turn so they resort to self inflicted pain in the form of self mutilation or even the extreme – suicide.

The song, Simple Man, speaks to whats important. It speaks to the heart of a man. Here are some of the lyrics:

Forget your lust for the rich man’s gold
All that you need is in your soul
And you can do this, oh baby, if you try
All that I want for you my son is to be satisfied

And be a simple kind of man
Be something you love and understand
Baby be a simple kind of man
Oh, won’t you do this for me son if you can? Oh yes, I will

Boy, don’t you worry you’ll find yourself
Follow your heart and nothing else
And you can do this, oh baby, if you try
All that I want for you my son is to be satisfied

The song strikes a strong cord with me due to my son being special needs and the challenges he faces daily and what he may face in the future. My inspiration for a series can come from a number of things – a topic, a title may come to me and sometimes, music. I have always loved this song and knew I wanted to do something with it or inspired by it for my son. I have also wanted to do a series against intolerance. That is what this series, Simple Man, is.

This series will tell the struggles of a male to just exist and follow their chosen path and the ensuing obstacles they will face by just being who they are. Simple Man will push past the issues of intolerance and hatred, bullying and ignorance and delves into ones own inner battles and exploration in the quest for identity.

Here is probably my favorite version of the song. I love it acoustic and in this setting. I feel it brings an honesty to it and more emotion.

End Intolerance!

Ok folks, this contest is for boys only. We are giving away a free photo session and 8×10 print. Winner will be selected randomly.

Bullying sucks. Many of us, if not most, were the victim of it. Maybe it happened because of a hobby or interest, maybe it happened because of who you were attracted to. Perhaps you just seemed “weak” and it made themselves feel more powerful to tease you. I was often the mark as a young kid. I was not very athletic. I was quiet and shy. At one point, my mom wanted to put me in boxing. Honestly, there is not much about my childhood that I care to relive. I do not admire anyone going through childhood.

This is something I dread and am fearful of for my son who is special needs. I do not look forward to middle school or high school. I think I am dreading that more then guys and my daughter! HA! But this topic really rings a bell and is very much a touchy topic for me. Sadly, too often you see these situations ending very badly. There are no winners in bullying. None.

People fear what is different, what is not the norm. They laugh at or mock what does not fit into societal acceptance. They are scared or comfortable with those who dare to be an individual and follow their hearts whether its a fashion trend, music choice, interest in art or who they love. Likely, it is their own insecurity with themselves. It is easier to point the finger and divert the attention.

So, how has bullying or intolerance affected you? Have you been teased, picked on or even worse? We would love to hear your story. You can do it anonymously, if you wish. You can email me at brian@bmengini.com. These stories will not be posted on Facebook. Has there been a time when you stood up to a bully? What did you do? What do you think we can do to lessen these situations?